DOUG’S FINAL ENTRY #3 (END)

Chucky: Doug, I think its wonderful how you thought you were out the door to do some coke and then God lead you back to hear more about Jesus. You can’t realy stay away can you? Let me know when your born again.

Jeffrey: Whether you’re talking to the snow, the smoke, or the needle, the end result is the same. You in a small box and you don’t have the key. You rant against everything because it is the only way you can attempt to confirm to yourself that you… still have an identity. You know I know by what I say.

Doug: Sorry, Chuck, wrong again. Just made a call and had all the bitches and the party relocated here. We’re all laughin’ our asses off at the assinine bullshit you and your creepy friends continue to spew forth. I guess me and satan have managed to make you all stay here and face a little truth about yourselves. Let me know when you grow more braincells, a spine, and lose the sheep mentality, mmmmkaayyy? ;0) And, not, Jeff, I will not end up in a small box being slowly returning to the maggots from which you came because I am going to be stuffed and stay in my master’s house. When he croaks, well, then I hope a little boy buys me in a taxidermy shop! Whoof!

 

Sampson: Doug, what is love and what meaning does it possibly carry in an Atheistic materialistic world? Don’t you suggest we are all matter, falling through space? What different does it make one person loves another, or shoots them?

Doug: Ah – you just keep coming back for more! Yes, I know that you know of which you speak in this case, you ex-junkie, you! I do not, however, rant against everything, just mainly the hateful disease and evil lies you and your onerous religion spreads. And since you are not familiar with hearing the truth, it’s understandable you’d confuse it for a ‘rant’. Not that there’s anything wrong with a good old rant now and again… or a bark, or a howwwllllll!

Sammy baby – you’re question only goes to illuminate the fact that you are assholistic (meaning, an asshole at every level) and a total idiot as well. I guess a mind as small as yours can’t handle the complexities of living in the real world. If you think there’s any love to be had by believing in a book that says that it’s okay for one human to own another… well, you deserve to have an IQ of a fencepost.

Come on, ladies. I own you all with one hand tied behind my back! Can you not get a whole bunch more of you to take me on so that we can even up this fight a little bit in your favor? This is like shooting fish in a barrel! Amusing, but hardly challenging.

Sampson: Doug, how does Atheism suggest it’s “wrong” for one human to own another? Have you ever owned a pet? In Atheism, man has no more rights than any other animal.

Jeffrey: You wouldn’t know the truth if someone gave it to you to tie off with… You make that obvious by choosing to run from it into addiction.

Doug: Can’t you read, Sammy? The bible, I said. Try and read it sometime. And are you so stuck up your own butt that you seem to forget that you are an animal – an animal speaking to another animal, a dog – hell! A mere pup. You think you’re better than me, eh? Well, this world was a far better place for us dogs when you greedy, fucked up people came with your demented ideas about invisible men in the sky! Do you still believe in the god Thor? No? Oh – you fucking atheist piece of poop!

Your false god is a slave merchant and slave owner. And you the cowering-on-your-knees-facing-the-ground slave!

And Jeff – you know all about running away don’t you… from the truth, and the bullies who used to pick on you in school for being such a snotty little shit!

Doug: What?! Where’d all you sissy’s go? That the best you got? My god (The Luscious Lesbian Leprechaun) owns your feeble god any day! You’re not worthy to suck her big toe!

Chucky: Good Doug. Thanks for bringing people over your house so they can see too. Thats ussualy how street ministry works. The preacher preaches, God sends someone to mock him wich causes a crowd and then during it all some bystandard hears the gos…pel which leads them to salvation. Its like street preaching on face book. AMEN AND BELIEVE THE GOSPEL OF JESUS CHRIST BEFORE ITS TO LATE.

Doug: Too late, Chucky. They’ve already been saved. We hang with the one true god – and she’s grooooovy! You deny her existence. You goddamned atheist!

Only weak minded scaredy cats like you bunch of wriggling worms stoop to the squalid position of making idle threats. We, on the other hand, are above such silliness! If you don’t believe in the Luscious Lesbian Leprechaun Goddess, she doesn’t really give a shit. She doesn’t blame you either, since you are too feeble-minded and spineless to crawl out from under that blinding rock you live beneath! She has nothing but pity for you.

Jeffrey: how many things are laying around half-way fixed Doug?

Doug: Jeff, you haven’t made much sense so far, but that is ridonkulous! Lay off the crystal-meth, man!

Carap: why dont you guys just stop talking to him…even Jesus chose not to go back to certain places or people because they rejected him, you have to hear believe and then recieve, he doesnt believe so move on, we’re told not to throw pearls before swine, the pearls are the gift of salvation, how precious it is like a pearl and if we throw before swine the pigs will just move it around in the mud and treat it horrible, just move on

Doug: Spoken like a true pig! The reason they keep comin’ back is because in a fight like this they are protected by anonymity and thousands of miles of ocean. Now, Miss Piggy, why don’t you just move on, take your snout out of our business, and lead by example?

Doug: Pigs and worms and maggots and asses. Bunch of clucking chickens!

Jeffrey: Doug… You know I’m talking sense. You know it very well. You know I have been “around”. I can tell you that I have been in the deepest darkest depths of addiction, and have been free for 9 years. You say there are no miracles, but I am one. You want to say I’m weak, but the others who partied with me are dead or in jail. Gotta run for awhile, but I’ll check back in. God is good, even to such as Doug. I know because there was a time….

Doug: You’re confusing your story for mine. And you seem to be confusing the word ‘miracle’ for the word ‘mackeral’! You must have a fish for a head. You’re not still alive because your fake god specially chose to save you and not the others… you just didn’t dare to do as much shit as they did! My gosh, the arrogance of you assholes is simply stunning no matter how many times I hear it. So what’s the bid deal? You swapped one addiction for another. Now you’re addicted to spewing bullshit from that book of hate you can’t seem to get enough of. So fucking what! That the best argument you got? Well, you’re in deeper trouble than you thought.

Sampson: In accordance with Proverbs 14:7 I won’t partake in this discussion any further. Doug is a testimony of just how depraved man is in the absence of God’s grace. Proverbs 16:4, “The LORD has made everything for its own purpose, Even the wicked for the day of evil.”

Jeffrey: Again you plod along in your ignorance. You rail against the wind, kicking at you’re own conscience. You know you’re in darkness but your screams of let there be light avail you naught. The sad thing its the glob of cells you as an atheist relegate yourself to being deserves no better according your own tenents. You have the arrogance to denounce the Eternal God then call others arrogant. In essence, you’re false and it is apparent to all.

Doug: Talking to you guys is like going around in circles and my head is starting to spin. In accordance with the Lesbian Leprechaun’s rules, you shall not be judged for your evil insanity, just pitied. And to those (like Jeffrey) who talk to themselves, we should laugh and rejoice we are not alone and desperate. Oh, ye atheists of no faith – when will you ever learn? Now – enuff, bunch! Time to partay! If you want to do this again, you’d better get a crew of others who have real, fully formed ideas and an idea how to communicate them. Cheers!

Jeffrey: The conclusion, when all has been heard, is: fear God and keep His commandments, because this applies to every one. For God will bring every act to judgment, everything which is hidden, whether it is good or evil.

Ecclesiastes 12:13-14

I couldn’t care less what people think of me, but God… that’s a different matter entirely.

 

Doug: Yeah, according to your evil little book of scribblings. Everything, including you pussies, begin and conclude in the abundant womb of the fabulously fun and wonderfully creative LLL Goddess! You should not blaspheme against her and my religion.

There are laws you know!

;0) Gurrrrrrruuuffff!!!

(Chuck and his gang of god-warriors ‘unfriended’ Doug shortly after this conversation. While they continue trying to help gullible folks find Jebus… Doug is sailing in the Carribean with his gang of real friends, Captain of the ship he sails!)

© 2010 Wordwurst

DOUG’S FINAL ENTRY #2

Jeffrey: Doug, you again don’t know me, but that ok… you are too full of yourself. I don’t need to curse you, you do with your own mouth. You try to shock people but I’ve been berated by paid professionals. You just come up loud but inconsequential.

Bobby: It’s obvious Chuck, that if he didn’t want to hear the gospel, or hear the truth, he would be off doing other things. I think he wants salvation.

Doug: I do not want nor need to be saved. Shit – you’re dumber than a sack of dung. And your allusion to bondage only gives the game away. You dressed up and tied up right now, are ya, Chuck? Is Jon and Bob treating you like the unworthy piece of crap you are? Okay then… I’ll let you get back to it! Enjoy, kids, enjoy!

Bobby: You can fool yourself Doug, but you can’t fool God. You obviously want what we have.

Chucky: Doug, You are the one who is tied up in bondage and you don’t realize it. God commands you to repent and trust in the blood of Jesus Christ.

Doug: He must be omnipotent like you, Chuck, ‘cus no matter how much he commands, I just flip him the paw. Obviously, you caved to his commands.

Goodbye girls – off to snort some coke off a beautiful bitch’s naked ass, and then enjoy a night long orgy – a normal one, though, not the kind you girly-boys would be interested in. So, you pray for me, ‘kay? And, of course, I’ll think for you! Toodle-oooh! ;0)

Bobby: I think he bugged out.

Bobby: Will do Doug, and Remember, we love you and God loves you.

Chucky: You shouldn’t do that Doug. You should stay home and read your bible instead. For the 10th time. What would you give for your soul? A line of coke?

Jeffrey: Nah.. you sound like more the angry tweaker type. How long since you last slept. I’ll enjoy great sex with my wife and I won’t come home with any “Bonus Gifts”. Yes we will pray for you, don’t worry. You’re not the only one who was ever angry with God.

Chucky: Doug, You can snort all the coke in the world and sleep with every woman but your life will still be empty and meaningless. Unless you repent from your wickedness and trust in Christ your only purpose in life will be to glorify God on the day he pours his mighty wrath out you.

Stapp: whtf have u been getting into down there chuck!!!! i just read all these comments and im a little creeped out bro!!! haha

Doug: Was halfway down the road when I realised I forgot the box of sex toys these hot bitches go crazy for. Came back to get it and here you girly-boys still are, talking bat-shit crazy stuff to me even though I’m gone! I think that sums it up, don’t you? You may as well be talking into empty space for all the good you’re doing.

Bob, fuck you, I don’t want your love, okay. Give it to these bunch of repressed homosexicals, okay?

Jeff, the only great sex you’ll enjoy is when you jerk your two inch flaccid rodent dick to The Passion snuff movie for christian gays. Yeah, I know you’ll pray for me – that’s how outrageously stoooopid you are. I’ll think for you, kay?

And Chuckyboy – things between us were going along okay with you and me here for a while, but now that your group of fag hags have joined in struttin’ their junk, well… I just don’t know anymore. They’s all a bunch o’ angry-assed hate-mongering mind-raping sucker of satan’s and god’s and jebus’ and the spirit’s cocks! Tell ’em to keep dat kind o’ shit in church where it b’longs and you and I can get back to your deconversion, fair enuff?

Now, I must be off to float in the heavenly sea of pretty dog ass!

It’s been real! ;0)

Stapp: yeah i believe in god im catholic n shit but i don’t take it to that level!!!

Carap: dont throw your pearls before swine…

Jeffrey: read the above thread and it is very easy to see where the hate lies. Its refreshing to see the hate, Christ said it would and should be this way.

Doug: Chuck and the girls take it at every level, and take it in every orifice – don’t you Chucky-boy?

John, I used to be a Catholic myself… but, y’know, y’grow. I’m happy to hear that you haven’t become like these clowns, they give your god an even worse name than he already has. It’s people like them that made me what I am today. I guess, in a way, I should be thankful to them for that.

Thanks, girls – mmwwwhhaaah! ;0)

Cara – you solipsistic arsehole. They weren’t throwing their ‘pearls’ before you! And, if you confuse lumps of turd with pearls, you are dumber than an old fat sow!

You can all try to dress up your hate as much as you like – like lipstick on a pig – but you’re fooling nobody. Every right thinking person knows that you’re sad sack of shit of a make-believe god is a liar, fornicator, rapist (Yes – he raped Mary, didn’t he? I mean, come on, she was a good girl and she was with Joseph, and god, without even marrying her first, comes along and shags her senseless! What a perv!), murderer, encourager of paedophilia, incest, rape, torture, killing, stealing and overall general naughty shenanigans!

Do you really think you’re fooling anyone with this holier-than-thou – oooh! look at me I’m so self-righteous and gorgeous that god thinks I’m just fab and will do me a few favors for all my attempts at good PR! Freakazoids, the lot of you. But if you ever get over it, maybe we could be friends – no leashes attached, no threats of eternal damnation, ‘kay. You’ll be safe with me cuz I actually care about people, I don’t pretend to, like some. It is not your god, but me, who is man’s best friend.

Stapp: the only time u will see me in church is a wedding or a funeral or if im in jail i go just to get out of the unit!!! hahaha but thats it for me i just can’t get into it…

Doug: My master is a therapist, Jeff, and I’ve learned much while sitting at his feet when he works with clients. You saying that I’m the hater – it’s called projection. I’d suggest that you see a doctor, but I’d actually prefer that your head slowly caves in for the lack of brain matter to hold it up. And, you’re right about saying that it’s very easy to see where the hate lies. You mother’s are filled with it – it oozes from every sanctimonious pore of your swollen corpulent sluglike bodies. Invasion of the body-snatchers. Sorry, Jeffrey, but the aliens got you. Don’t blame yourself, it’s not your fault. It’s not your fault… :0)

Jeffrey: Do you still have your own teeth Doug, or has the meth-mouth set in yet? Picking at sores? Has your nose rotted out yet? Anyway… Have Fun you crazy guy you! You’re the one that said he was running off to do blow…

Doug: This canine has all his canines! How silly, Jeffrey – dogs don’t do meth. And that’s another thing – all you fuckers suffer a serious case of selective listening and a sad lack of a sense of humor! I said coke, not meth. The coke you’re doing must be very poor quality. I only do the best!

Sampson: Doug, you’re a testimony of who I could have been without the transforming Grace of God. Even an inconsistent, irrational atheist like yourself brings Glory to God. I just find it odd that you are calling us hateful, and yet you are the one launching all of the insults with no apparent intention of speaking as a mature adult dog.

I suspect the Holy Spirit is convicting you right now, drawing out an even more sinful and hate-filled response, but then again, that’s the natural response we sinners have to holiness – that is, until God chooses to remove our sinful hearts, and make us a new creature.

I’ll pray for you, Dog, that you don’t meet God’s wrath. It’s easy to breath out profanities against your Creator while there’s a breath in your lungs, but you too will cease to breath one day – no matter of arrogant boastful hatred will protect you from receiving Justice.

I don’t want that for you, and I’m sure Chuck doesn’t either. Repent, while you have time to do so.

Jeffrey: Now who’s a kidder… You’re anger is far more typical of a gak-fiend. Don’t be shy… we already know.

Doug: Good for you, John – you obviously still have a mind of your own. Which is a crime when it comes to these whining maggots and there mindless worship and following of an imaginary maniac. I wish you all the very best, John. It’s refreshing to speak to someone on here who is still sane. :0) Sampson – have you run out of ‘e’s?

Sampson: Owen, your comments here hardly demonstrate much sanity on your part. You just seem like a hate-filled sinner under conviction for his lifestyle.

Jeffrey: He’ll be back in a minute… he peeking out though the blinds.

Doug: Hey Sampson, if you have the time to do so, go fuck yourself. I am above you, not of you. You are mere mortal man. I am Dog!

Again, because you’re slow on the uptake, you scumbags just try to hide your disgusting filthy hatred behind platitudes and scripture while it is plain to see and hear that beneath the veneer you are a seething pit of evil vipers! There’s a saying you probably won’t understand: The meaning of your communication is in the response you get. Take a few days off to think about it, assuming you still have the ability to do so. Then, ask yourself, since this is the kind of response you get from enlightened humanitarians, what could the meaning of your communication about god and jebus and all that hocus-pocus fairy-tale nonsense mean?

And since it is a fairy-tale, does that mean you are a fairy? Nothing more disgusting than a fairy in denial judging a fairy who at least has enough balls to come out of the closet. Come on, Sam, it’s time. You can come out now. Stop repressing you’re latent nature. If Jebus were true, he was obviously a homosexual… so, if it’s good enough for him, is it not good enough for you?

I can look right into that black little heart of yours and see a flaming faggot just dying to burst forth and be free! It’s okay, Sammy baby, it’s okay. I won’t judge you like all those hypocritical party-poopers who call themselves christians but are nothing more than empty-headed charlatans. Don’t worry, it’ll get better! :0)

 Jeffrey: quick… check again… I’m sure I heard someone pull up…

Doug: That’s right, Jeff, let your mask down and show us all who you really are underneath your feeble pretence of piety… go on…

Sampson: Doug, you can’t present yourself as a voice of reason, or a loving alternative to Christianity when everything you post here is full of hatred and insults. Atheism is inherently irrational, perhaps that is what bothers you.

Doug: Oh, Sammy boy, the pipe, the pipe is calling! The only person trying to pretend he’s something he is not, is you – and the rest of your girly gang. You are an atheist, too. At least I’m not a scaredy-cat to admit it. Everything you post on here just shows that you have no idea what love or compassion is. Which is understandable – because the way you talk wouldn’t incline anyone in their right mind to show you love or compassion. You can go on pretending that the invisible mind-dildo loves you, if that makes you feel any better.

As for you, Flowery, maybe its time to lay off the jebus-juice. Paranoia seems to be annoyin’ ya. But remember, just ‘cuz you’re paranoid doesn’t mean that everyone isn’t out to get you. They are coming to take you away – ha-ha hee-hee ho-ho! To the funny farm. ;0)

Jeffrey: ‎”because the way you talk wouldn’t incline anyone in their right mind to show you love or compassion.” Doug… truer words have not been spoken.

Doug: Finally, we agree on something, eh? Who’d a thunk it?

Jeffrey: yes but I’m talking about you… 🙂

Doug: I know you think you are. But I also know how to read between the lines (subtext) and get who you’re really talking to. Its okay, your secret is safe with me. Now that you’re beginning to ‘fess up to the truth, you just might be okay some day. Miracles don’t happen, but people can change. Fingers crossed.

(tbc…)

© 2010 Wordwurst

DOUG’S FINAL ENTRY #1

This is the first part of the final instalment of Doug’s Facebook conversations with a number of born-again-christians. It is useful to note that, having had many previous conversations (especially with Chucky) about the notion of a creator (specifically the one they have chosen), Doug attempts a new strategy to make his points clear.

No matter how many times Doug plainly stated that he was once a christian himself, had read the bible many times, and came to the conclusion that there is no god or devil, no heaven or hell, he was contradicted and called a liar. Being a the kind of dog he is, he found their way of debating/conversing/communicating both insulting and childish.

So, he decided to fight fire with fire and pulled out all the stops in his attempts to lower himself to their level and be as insulting and childish as he could manage. The results (if you are not overly offended by the use of swear words) are hilarious… and somewhat startling. No matter what Doug said, these guys just didn’t know when to quit or how to change the way they spoke to him and the threats they continuously made.

I have since banned Doug from debating with god-believers on my Facebook page and he is now in training to be a stand-up comedian.

NB: The names of the god-believers in these final instalments have been changed to protect the moronic!

NBB: Doug was only joking when he talked about snorting coke and having sex-orgies with a group of bitches. Doug has been clean and sobre for the last four years and his happily married. One day, he and his wife hope to have a few pups and start their own canine family.

Chucky: M’r:9:47: And if thine eye offend thee, pluck it out: it is better for thee to enter into the kingdom of God with one eye, than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire: You can rip the eye out of the perverted all day but only God can rip the perversion out of the perverted.

Gary: Amen, lest you would simply end up with a blind pervert!

Doug: What if your tongue offends me? Shall I pluck it out? Has your fairy-tale god ripped the perversion out of you yet, Chucky? :0)

Sampson: Don’t confuse the Biblical use of “offend,” Doug. It doesn’t mean “offensive,” but rather “to sin against.”

Doug: How presumptuous of you, Mr Sampson, to assume I do not know the difference. You must be a born-again-christian because, in my experience, the ones I have had the displeasure to have met all came across as self-righteous, arrogant assholes… and it sounds like you are one of those, too, am I wrong? Just so you know, I was born-again and have read the bible more times than you’ve said stupid things. I grew up, learned to think for myself and grew out of it. Maybe, if you think for yourself, you may one day too! I’ll pray to my master for you, if you like.

Chucky: Doug, You never grew out of it because you were never in it.
You must be born again! The bible clearly describes your characteristics in that you were a false believer.

Doug: There you go – more ignorant, arrogant assertion of bullshit! I think I know my life better than you do, Chuckyboy. I will not argue with someone acting like a moron. You want to talk? Happy to do so as long as you refrain from childish and incorrect contradiction. You think you can do that?

Chucky: If you want me to agree with you? No Sir.

Doug: Agree with me? I have no idea what you are talking about! The bible is full of erroneous information, contradiction, stupidity… just like you, Chuck! I wonder, is that where you got the characteristics of a fucktard asshole, or did you take them from your fairy-tale book?

Chucky: God is going to throw you in hell one day. You are going to spend eternity in torment because of your foolishness

Doug: Emm… wrong again. Wait – maybe not! Perhaps I am already there because I can think of no worse torment than trying to communicate with you. You’re like a pathetic little boy with your silly little threats. If there was a hell, Chuck, I’d gladly go there to avoid having to spend eternity with a twit like you and a twat like god!

Chucky: Yes you would probably hate heaven. Hanging out with christian in the preasence of God.

Jeffrey: How amazing is this… A person jumps a thread, and attacks other peoples religion while pondering offenses against himself. He then accuses others of presumption while using the most assumptive of terms… “You must be”, “You are all”, “It… sounds like” etc… You must be a very wise man Chuck. If this man read the Bible 100 times, then you have said fewer then 100 stupid things in you life time. I was passed 100 when I was 4 years old. I tip my hat to ya… 🙂 The code of the “New Atheist”.  1) Believe there is no God. 2) Hate Him anyway.

Doug: You got that right, Chuckyboy! Having to listen to you sycophantic whining maggots as you grovel to god for the crumbs of his favors forever! When the day comes, as it surely will, that the bubble of delusion you live in POPS! you are going to have to get the two brain cells you have left to work together. Right now they just seem to be waving goodbye to each other.

Chucky: I would hate heaven too if it wasn’t for the grace of God. You need to repent and trust in Jesus.

Doug: What a complete prick this Jeff fucktard is! Talk about presuming. Chuck and I have been ‘enjoying’ conversations like this for some time now and I have gotten to know him, Jeff, thank you very much. You, I already know and PWN!. Now, why don’t you suck Chucks tiny weiner while he reads passages about hell to you from the bible? You are so mentally retarded that you do not understand that you, like me, are an atheist. You do not believe in the thousands of gods that preceded the one that’s now in favor in your little part of the planet. I’m just one god ahead of you. Now, go and play with the other kids and stay out of the seriousness business us adults are getting on with, ‘mmmmkay? Kay!

Sampson: Doug, I didn’t insult you – it’s beyond me why you would want to insult me. I was making a simple distinction between the meaning of the text, and the understanding of the terminology you provided.

If you left the body of Christ, it’s because you weren’t in it to begin with: 1 John 2:19, “They went out from us, but they were not of us; for if they had been of us, they would no doubt have continued with us: but they went out, that they might be made manifest that they were not all of us.”

Nobody can be born-again, and then not born-again. As Christ said in John 6:39, “And this is the Father’s will which hath sent me, that of all which he hath given me I should lose nothing, but should raise it up again at the last day.”

Jesus cannot lose anybody that was given to him of the Father. So as 1 John 2:19 points out, if you aren’t with the body of Christ, it’s because you were never with the body of Christ.

This isn’t arrogance, this is the Word of God. If you reject God’s Word, your world view will make absolutely no sense. I’d be willing to demonstrate that to you if you can speak to me like an adult, with respect, and not littering our interactions with insults.

Doug: You’re very existence insults me! Your self-righteous and ludicrous assumption that if I do not understand the way you do or believe the way you do that I don’t understand. Why? Because GOD SAID SO! What is it with maggots like you who set themselves up to pretend they know anything when they clearly know nothing about anything.

Judgemental little bigots like you are some of the fuel for the stupid beliefs that inform the behaviours of bullies and end in the deaths of innocent young men who happen to be homosexual, or providing the much needed service of abortion to women who – with their own set of circumstances – decide that they need one.

I don’t give a flying fuck if you believe that I was born again or not, you gimp-minded twat-faced git. Being able to quote the bible at me doesn’t make you look smart (with a face like yours, nothing could) it just makes you sound like a brainless parrot! Now, get on your knees and suck it – and beg the holy ghost to help you keep your true identity repressed. Of course, he will not because he does not exist and if he did he’d just be a no-good lying sack of shit like the other two he claims to be, goo-googa-joob!

Am I getting through, Sampson? I see right through your vacant little heart and dirty little soul. Time to get back in the closet and turn the light out and pull the covers up to your chin and hope the big scary hairy old devil don’t gitchooo! He’ll fuck you like he fucks the ball-less god you fear so much. Making sense? No? Didn’t think so. It would take some intellect to get any kind of grasp… and you lost yours a long time ago. Whhhoooofffff! ;0)

Chucky: Doug, One day your bubble of elusion will be popped and you will fear God.

Isa:25:7: And he will destroy in this mountain the face of the covering cast over all people, and the vail that is spread over all nations.

Psalms:102:15: So the heathen shall fear the name of the LORD, and all the kings of the earth thy glory.

Psalms:33:8: Let all the earth fear the LORD: let all the inhabitants of the world stand in awe of him.

Psalms:64:9: And all men shall fear, and shall declare the work of God; for they shall wisely consider of his doing.

Bobby: So many like this dog, Doug, actually believe they had a born again experience, and use that to launch their hate campaign. I think the fact that God didn’t meet their fairytale expectations of wish granter, that they then decided to judge him unworthy to grant them anything.

The bitterness comes from seeing him grant his true children blessings, while ignoring the pleas of the unredeemed.

You sir have never been born again. You would know, and we most definitely would know by your words alone.

Doug: Goddamn! You two slaves just don’t get it, do you? Okay, you need lots of repetition, right? I know the bible better than you know each others penises. Why do you waste your time quoting it to me? I don’t believe in your malevolent, evil, capricious god. Most people who do not suffer with mental delusion do not believe in your god. If your bible was right – I’d be fearing this asshole, right? Well, I don’t. Because he’s about as real as your pretence to be heterosexual.

One more time – in big letters so you get it: I DENY THE HOLY GHOST, JESUS AND GOD. THEY DO NOT EXIST. IF THEY DID, I WOULD LOCK THEM UP FOR CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY.

I mean, come on, look what they’ve done to you worthless, robotic, moronic, demonic suckers of satan’s cock!! Read it over twenty times and let it sink in. If you waste my time with any more scripture you’ll only be proving my point. Now, go put on your sisters underwear and let Jon pee on you, kay?

Chucky: The Lord rebuke you.

Bobby: Make that 3 Doug, I agree with Chuck and Sampson. Well, at least you admitted there is a hell, which must also mean you believe in a heaven. One may further assume then, that you also believe in a heaven creator since neither that nor hell could spontaneously create itself. Having gone that far, and knowing heaven is created by God, you must further conclude that he exists.  What was your point again?

Chucky: Doug you are trapped in bondage by your sins to your father the devil. You need to repent and believe the Gospel if you want to be saved.

Doug: D’uh, Bob… you might want to reread what I wrote, it’s all there. I do not and cannot hate god because it doesn’t exist. I hate the way you fuckers are so self-righteous, judgemental and mentally defective because you are a danger to yourself and others. Innocent people are tormented because of the bullshit you stand for. Go on, keep deluding yourself that those who don’t believe in your pathetic god are jealous that he didn’t shine his light on them. Makes you feel special, don’t it? Anywhere you can get that strong desire to feel special you’ll go there. Now, go away and suck Chuck and Jon’s willy-winkies and get that special feeling of validation you so desperately crave, you maggot faeces!

(tbc…)

© 2010 Doug The D’Awg

FARCICAL FACEBOOK CONVERSATION #2

GOD BELIEVER

VERSUS

DOUG THE DOG

GOD BELIEVER: I thank God for Dr. John MacArthur!

DOUG THE DOG: Do you thank god for Dr Tiller – the man murdered by a christian? I mean, wasn’t Dr Tiller also created by the god of which you speak? Just curious. I’m a dog on a path to discover the truth about god, or the lack thereof.

GB: As the deer pants for the water brooks, so pants my soul for You, O God.” Psalm 42:1

DD: “My pants need water to wash them when they get soiled.” Barkings 12:11 (The Word of Dog)

GB: The heavens have no voice yet they shout of God’s glory to the ends of the earth.

DD: Being a dog, I’m not as smart as humans, so, can you run that by me again. The heavens have no voice but they shout? Is this not an oxymoron?

GB: Compared to my own need of grace (past, present, & future) the grace I must show others is indeed quite small.

DD: ??

GB: You can’t muster up a heart of affections for Christ & the things of God…you must be born again.

DD: When I was born, amongst a large litter of little squealing pups, somehow, they managed to push me in again. A few minutes later I came out again. I’ve been born again from the very start. Wooof!

GB: If we started to hear “damn” & “hell” in their proper biblical use in more pulpits, we might hear them less as everyday cuss words.

DD: Hell yeah! I agree with that. And damn all those who don’t!

GB: Only 1 creature, man not angel, can live to the praise of the glory of God’s grace because he has personally experienced it in redemption.

DD: I am that creature – behold: I am DOG! Man is my best friend and master. When I met my master I said: I hid under the house because I love you, master! He is good to me. And even if I make mistakes he loves me and tries to teach me better. He’s promised to never throw me into the fire of which I am very afraid. I love him. He is good to me and would never burn me up for all eternity. Woof!

GB: Christ never asked for help in carrying the cross yet He requires those who want to follow Him to deny self & take up their cross daily.

DD: As a dog, I have no self to speak of. I don’t have a cross either. But I have a ball – will that do?

Will you be my friend?

GB: There’s a fine line between discernment and a critical spirit. I know because I have crossed it far too many times.

DD: Me too! I used to try to color inside the lines, too, when I was a pup, but so often went outside of them. But my teacher, Mrs Izzardtail, told me it was bad if I didn’t stay inside them. She also said, flowers are red and grass is green. Eventually, I came to dislike art and gave up on it. Now I just look at other dog’s art on the screen of my computer. Ah well. I suppose my artistic flair and desire was crushed out of me for some higher and better purpose. I’ll be happy to share that with you as soon as I find out what it is. God only knows!

GB: True communion with Christ doesn’t fit on a “To-Do” list.

DD: Darn! I’m going to have to cross that one off then!

GB: Jesus never cast out the demon of any sin but commanded the sinner to repent.

DD: Does a human have to pent before s/he can repent?

GB: “I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak” Matt 12:36 Makes me reconsider before posting on FB!

DD: Me is verrrrry careful what I speak, not because I’m afraid of the big dog in the sky, but because I am man’s best friend. And sadly, I know that some men are very thin-skinned and sensitive and can easily distort the meaning of things said or written into something they find offensive but was never intended. The Big Dog made me and he is my master and I loovvve him. If I do something wrong he teaches me. He never does anything bad to me so I do not fear him. I love him because I want to… not because of horrific events that will unfold if I don’t! That’s why I am sympathetic to man! Some people actually believe and tell others that their creator will have them burn in agony for eternity over some finite crime! Barking! Whooff!

GB: Special early morning time of communion with Christ flees all too quickly. Looking forward to eternity with Him in glory.

DD: Me don’t understand. You want to die? Should I say: Hope you get there soon? Confused. 😦

© 2010 ORP